Days of "Strawberry Jam" without "J"
Dear Jam,This is probably the longest of our longest days so far. And yet the best of my photoshoots yet! It was a busy day and I had thought it wouldn't be because it wasn't until later after we woke up did I receive a message from Tita Sheena that we were to pursue with her pre-debut shoot. I was a little lazy today; my cough was dragging my mind to limbo and here you were, demanding your favorite "eyesh" sunglasses, which you seemed to have left in Carmen. I was going to check out from my promise of being patient as I was antsy everytime you screamed at me to hold up, the only other pair of sunglasses you had left, close to your now as it oft slid down.
You seemed sweet at home, asking politely for my Watermelon Body mist after I spritzed myself with it. You mimicked the sound of the spritz, pretending that you were actually doing it. But then you were back to your naughty
twirly-wirly, kicking at me if you didn't get what you wanted. When we 
reached the relocation, I decided that things might as well not go as planned. Tita Sheena wasn't there yet and you made a nice gravy in your diaper that I had surrendered too soon. After I committed everything to God, tired of handling everything as I expected my own capacity to make, that's when things started to play rather well. With nowhere decent to wash you near the vicinity of the beach, we took a "sikad" ride to Ninang Mayang's, which was just about a few miles from the Raagas beach. Thankfully, they were around this time. We spent sometime with Angel, warring a tug on her books again although she offered after her Dad reminded her what he would do when she misbehaved. We waited for Tita Sheena and their parents as we gave in to Angel's offer of a book and once in a while, you looked on her and her sister, your namesake, Louise. I was ashamed when I found out from Ninang Mayang that Tita Sheena and her parents had run late because they had to attend mass and the anniversary celebration of Monseigneur Monsanto, a beloved Catholic leader in our city. I wanted to hide myself in a paper bag - until recently, handling and organizing events, I have become such a perfectionist, I was always keen about promptness and punctuality. I had forgotten that this was all about having to enjoy, relish the life of a person who is about to celebrate their birthday and in this case, it was Tita Sheena.
The plan to move the location from Molugan to Raagas didn't even matter because we ended up in sweet old hometown anyway. The Raagas beach was pouring with people as far as the beach stretched while our Beach '88 was ours for the taking. One twist to this day that I greatly appreciate is the sudden and unexpected addition of Ninang Hazel who joined us with their baby James. We were joined by, other than the day's model Tita Sheena, their Mom, Dad, Ninang Mayang and Angel, and Ninang Hazel with James. So we were one big, happy family in that big van where Mamilola Daisy, Ninang Mayang's and Tita Sheena's mom bought us some grapes, which you munched down one after the other. Angel and James didn't enjoy it as much as you, perhaps because you didn't eat as much in lunch as the other two would have.
I have to say, I love this photo session. It's strange in a way because Tita Sheena isn't even my model, she is my client. Perhaps that's why she didn't have inhibitions because she knew this was for herself anyway. In fairness to my models, that's what I mean. She wasn't as shy because she knew what she wanted for her birthday, what she wanted to look like and I say she was rather comfortable wherever I asked her to pose. We had gone from the sun, to the rocks, to the sand, to the water and to seaweeds. Now the fun part is having you, Angel and James 
around. I am not complaining and I didn't complain there back in the set even if James added more footprints on the sand than I had planned. You were all lovely additions to my outtakes and behind-the-scenes shots! That is to include Ninang Mayang chasing after Angel and Ninang Hazel stopping James from touching Tita Sheena's legs. Yeap. James was running amok, if you may have it. Hahah! He was either touchy with Tita Sheena, attempting to kiss Angel, or err...well, he got to kiss you actually. You didn't protest. I did, inwardly but to speak malice of it may only arouse 
malice. You know. We all decided that since it was the beach, that it was right enough to allow you to swim. It was your first time to really step into the water by yourself. The first time you were acquainted to the beach, you were reluctant to climb down from either Auntie Sher's or my hold and that was last September. My have you grown, doing it all on your own! Thanks to you too, I get to practice with the effects before I use it on Tita Sheena. The primary picture up there helped me determine where the sun was setting so I could put Tita Sheena against it to capture her silhouette. Then there's a picture of your feet with your slip-ons afloating so I would set an inspiration for a feet medium shot. You were also Mommy's little apprentice when you borrowed the camera from my hand and took pictures of Tita Sheena, Ninang Mayang and Angel.
I feel a tad guilty having barged into Uncle Jerry's house like that. It wasn't how I intended it. I just wanted to have a place to keep our bags and had the van been waiting, we could have just skedaddled. Owing to your Uncle Jerry's ways of knighthood and gentleman-ness, he offered to cook dinner for us. They don't have much, you and I know that. They only have as much and enough for them and to impose ourselves was like toeing a certain line of respect. But he never runs out of ways to be generous and hospitable. Against my wishes of turning his offer down, he went ahead to prepare a sumptuous meal of bangus inihaw and humba and especially for you, he took a fish into a wonderful broth, which you unabashedly supped on with the ladle.
I thought with all the action going down, as Angel, James and you fell asleep in the van homeward bound, you would continue with the forty winks even in the hospital. But as I attempted to put you down, you were kicking and screaming my name. You regained the sprint that was normally "you", working yourself around Lolo's new room. They have now found a little more conducive room compared to the one they had yesterday. By the looks of it, he won't be out so soon. By the looks of it too, it served you right not to be listening to our warnings. When you ran out for fries form the bag 
Nahnang offered, and got bored from taking Lolo's pictures, you proceeded to his bedside and tinkered whatever your hands could get on. Unfortunately, it got on your hands, too. The table's faulty spring, gave, with your finger in the way - a lot of crying ensued, to cut it short. So, please listen next time, okay? But by the looks of how the pain was all too soon forgotten, we may as well forget that we had warned you.We stayed at Kauswagan for a couple of reasons. One was my need
to edit the day's shoot. Another was also to have a time to sit and talk it with Nahnang. I have to admit, I am rather worried about Lolo, I just don't show it much. Perhaps unlike Nahnang who cried when she confessed to feel blessed that the happenchance in her experience as a nursing student and nurse led to opportunities presented in these circumstances, I am worried of things elsewhere. I am worried about our half brother and sisters and the aunts and uncles from your Lolo's side. I was a little disappointed to see that they hadn't reacted since I posted a status on my 
Facebook about your Lolo and then it evolved into a concoction of emotions. Fear, maybe. Anger, maybe. Remorse, maybe. It was everything. Staying in Kauswagan, looking at Nahnang's creative assemblage of the Christmas tree dissuaded me from the thoughts. To see you recklessly snapping away with the camera, blabbing after Nahnang's talk as if you were mimicking her, helped all the more.JAMantic of Day:
With the cold in the hospital room, Mamilou and Nahnang had to wear these cute socks, which according to you were "sots". This was in the hospital by the way, where you also pointed Colonel Sanders, KFC's main man, printed on the KFC bag, you said "Lolo". It's good that you associate anything with a little age, beard and the aura to be a grandfather even as the print was merely in red. At Kauswagan where wore Mamilou's night shirts, you spotted the strawberries and called "soobeesh."
Your Mommy,
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